What is love?

I had a GLORIOUS time in Dakar this past weekend. I ate waaaaay too much, stayed up too late, and spent too much money (of course!). Despite all this, my favorite moments were the ones I got to spend with Liz, Mallory, and Tricia (the two other AWESOME Journeygirls in Senegal and our AMAZING Hands-On volunteer.) We were in the same guesthouse so we giggled way to much. Anyways, one of our topics of discussion was the attention we get from African men here. Mallory wrote a hilarious blog on this (which I shared with y'all), as did Liz. So I thought I would put my two-cents in.

Men here are very straight-forward with their feelings. I have had many proposals of marriage and many confessions of so-called "love." To give you a taste of what one of these is like, here is an example conversation I had a few weeks ago with a Senegalese man at a gas station while I'm trying to fill up my moto. Also, this conversation actually took place in English!

Dude: "Why, you are American!"
Me, nervously: "Yes."
Dude: "Your hairs are very beautiful."
Me, now wishing I had gone to another station: "Err, thanks."
Dude: "Are you married?"
Me: "No."
Dude: "We should get married. I have always wanted a white wife. You are very beautiful and I love you very much."
Me, now sufficiently creeped out: "No, I don't think we should get married. I leave that decision up to God."
Dude: "Yes, we should get married. I will build you a house by the seaside. It will be very big and beautiful."
Me: "But my family is in America and I will miss them very much. I don't think we should get married."
Dude: "Oh, that is not a problem! I will let you fly to America whenever you want!"
Me, highly doubtful: "But are you already married? I don't want to be a second or third wife."
Dude: "No, I am womanless."
Me, now wishing I hadn't made the statement above: "Well, you should find yourself a Senegalese wife. I am not Senegalese."

**I should now mention that at this point my moto is now full of gas, the attendant has been paid, and I am ready to leave. There is one problem - "Dude" is standing directly in front of my moto and is not budging.

Dude: "Are you going to leave me womanless? I love you! I want to marry you! Don't leave me womanless! I think we are of the same generation and we would make a very good marriage."
Me, now insulted because this guy is clearly older than me: "No, I really can't marry you because my father will not allow it. You see, he is a very mean and strict man. He requires that any man who wishes to marry me buy him three cars that very day. He always says no to every man who asks to marry me."

**Yes, I realize I told a lie. But I saw it as my only means of escape. My dad is actually a very kind and loving man and I have never even remotely had a guy ask my father if he could marry me!

Dude, with a dejected look on his face: "Oh, in that case, I guess we can't get married."
Me, happy: "No, we can't. I'm late for something and need to go. Bye."

I zip away on my moto, glad to have gotten away. Now, I need to add that not once in this whole conversation did "Dude" ask for my name nor did I get his name.

I don't know if it is because of the American shows or movies that they watch. I don't know if it is because of the American music they listen to. I don't know if it's because they don't realize they are using the word "love" in a context that has strong emotions attached with it. I don't know if they actually think we are going to reciprocate the emotion and we are actually going to get married. Who knows why they are so quick to say, "I love you." But they do. They do a lot! I can't even count how many men here have told me this. And it's not just me! The other American women here (married and unmarried) get the same thing.

At first this attention scared me. I came from never getting any attention from guys in the States to full-on confessions of love! I have now learned how to handle these proposals. My answers usually range from, "God has promised me someone in the United States," to "My father requires a huge and expensive dowry." These usually make them forget all about their "love" and leave me alone.

Now, stories like this just make me giggle.

Welcome to my life ...

Ok people. My friend Mallory just wrote the most AMAZING blog post and I thought I would share it because it is so applicable to the life of an American woman in Senegal! Please read and enjoy!

http://thathemayincrease.blogspot.com/

Fellowship

Acts 2:46-47 -- "Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved."

I read this Scripture a few days ago and I was reminded of it today. I had an amazing day today. We went to this REALLY nice pool for one of my kid's 7th birthday and several other missionary families were there. It was such a sweet time of fellowship and fun! I was sitting out of the pool, enjoying my Sudoku, when I just took some time to look around me. I was overwhelmed with this feeling of joy and peace. It has been a few months since I've had Christian fellowship like that with a large group of people. I don't get it once a week when I go to church. Yes, I have AWESOME team mates that I fellowship with at least twice a week, but there is just something special about many Christians coming together just to enjoy each other's company. No, we didn't meet in the "temple courts." Yes, we broke birthday cake instead of bread. But we ate together with glad and sincere hearts and we praised God with our fellowship.

Tricia and I were talking on the hour long ride home about things we miss in the States. Yes, the typical things popped up - wearing makeup daily, straight hair, cute clothes, being clean. One thing I didn't mention was what I experienced today - regular Christian fellowship. I miss Sunday mornings, Wednesday nights, and just getting together with friends for no reason at all but to be together. It saddens me that we as a mission aren't able to get together more often. Funds are low and many of our meetings have been cut. Not only were these meetings, but they were also times of fellowship and refreshment for us. We live in dry places - both physically and spiritually. We live in places where burn-out can happen so quickly. We live in places where discouragement can really take hold and bring you down. We need these special and dear times to refresh and reinvigorate us. God did not create us to live alone! He created us for beautiful, joyful fellowship together!

Plus, a pool never hurts! ;)

John Lennon

This morning, I was listening to John Lennon's song "Imagine." (My hippie side is rather fond of his music.) The words are quite utopian, yes, but what a dream! "Imagine there's no countries ... nothing to kill or die for; and no religion too ... Imagine all the people living life in peace." Yes, you may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one! That got me thinking about why so many people have this deep desire inside. Why do we desire peace and unity, but are so unable to attain it?

That is how God intended the world to be! He designed us to be in perfect relationship with Him and each other. We were designed to live on a perfect Earth in constant community with each other and God. But, because we chose to sin against God; because we chose to go our own way, we are unable to attain that perfection. We suffer through hurt, war, poverty, famine, disasters because of the sin that has entered the world. Yet, the desire for peace is still there.

I live in a place where poverty is everywhere. Just today a lady with a sick baby came to my door asking for a little bit of money to pay for a moto to take her to the hospital. I gave her the equivalent of $1 (a little more than the price of the moto ride) and she was so grateful. It breaks my heart to see people suffering. I mean, I have physical pain inside when I see small children playing with trash and cripples begging in the street. I can't stand it! It breaks my heart that I can't help every single one ... I would if I could! It is that God-given, deep desire for peace and harmony in the world that drives these feelings.

So, "imagine no possessions ... no need for greed or hunger ... imagine all the people, sharing all the world."

Poulet yassa and music

I had a great time tonight with some really fun girls! Liz and Tricia invited over three of their friends for yassa (an INCREDIBLE chicken, onion, and rice dish). Of course, they ended up having to cook most of it because we "toubabs" struggle with the awesome Senegalese dishes. While we were cooking, one of the girls pulls out her MP3 player and busts out some Beyonce!! Yeah for western music in the middle of Senegal! "To the left, to the left. Everything you own in the box to the left."

I love music. I love singing. I love dancing to music. I can remember as a little girl dancing around the house singing. I can even remember driving my family crazy because I liked to sing in the car, as well. I just can't help it! I love to sing! Most importantly, I love to sing to God. At night, as I'm getting ready for bed, I love to sing old hymns. You know, the good ones that many churches don't seem to play any more. Have you ever stopped and thought about the words to some of these songs? They are powerful! One that I sing quite often is "Trust and Obey."

Trust and obey,
For there's no other way,
To be happy in Jesus,
But to trust and obey.

Sometimes it can be hard to be "happy in Jesus." Especially in Africa. Especially in hot, sandy, sweaty, no electricity, no water Africa. I've had many days where I have not been "happy in Jesus." Days where I just grumble and gripe. Days where I disgust myself with my selfishness. That's when I bring this song to mind. I am trusting and obeying Jesus by being here. There is no other way for me right now. I should try my hardest to be happy in Jesus because I am trusting and obeying Him.

Anyways, I thought I would share a few pics from some recent fun times! Enjoy!

Now, Liz, save some for the rest of us!


Cutting up food for the feast!


Me and Tricia and our enormous sunglasses that overpower the picture ...


Cooking a la Senegalese ...

Laughter

Has the Bible ever made you laugh? I love it when that happens. It reminds me that God has a sense of humor. This morning, I was reading through the different accounts of Jesus' resurrection and I love Luke's account. The women (Mary Magdalene, Joanna, Mary mother of James, and several others) have just discovered the empty tomb and have run back to tell the disciples. But what do the disciples do? They don't believe because their words "seem like nonsense!" I just started to giggle! I can just imagine these women running up to the disciples, frantic and scared, but the men only shake their heads and mutter, "Crazy women. They don't know what they are talking about."

One man though, Peter, is different. He decides he wants to check this out. He runs to the tomb and discovers that the "crazy" women are telling the truth! I can just imagine the ladies retorting, "Told ya so!" That made me laugh too.

I love to laugh. I love people who make me laugh. I did a lot of laughing today. I had a fun Easter with the Forsythes, Liz, Tricia, and several other friends here in Fatick. We laughed when I failed big time at trying to cut an onion without a cutting board - Senegalese style. We laughed when the kids rushed frantically around the yard scouting out eggs. We laughed when Marie Noelle told jokes. We laughed at Liz and Tricia's music video. I believe this is one of the best ways to celebrate our risen Savior - in fellowship with others; in community with people we care about. I truly care about each one of these people. I might not be the best at showing it, but I do. And I loved every minute of today.

Writing ...

I used to enjoy writing. As a young girl, I would always write my thoughts down. I had quite a vivid imagination, too. I was always writing stories with characters that did things that I wished I could do and possessed qualities that I wished I possessed. When I was about 10, I had the brilliant idea to write a series of books about a young ice skater. She won all the championships and always had the cutest boy in class as her boyfriend. I think this was right around the 1994 winter olympics, so I was going through my periodic gee-I-wish-I-was-an-ice-skater phase. Every little girl goes through phases like that - pony phases, dancer phases, ice skater phases ... I could go on forever.

I don't think girls ever outgrow going through phases ...

I geuss this new-found desire to write has come from the fact that I have been reading Donald Miller lately. I finished his "Million Miles in a Thousand Years" in about three days. In it, he talks about your story and how you have to be pro-active in creating your story. That got me thinking ... what about my story? My whole life has been a pretty cool story - it has had it's boring moments, but it's still pretty cool. I mean, when I was only a year old, my family and I moved to Nome, Alaska. And then when I was ten, we were living in France and then on to West Africa. The life of an MK is quite a unique story. I realized that I have a pretty interesting story, but no real documentation of it. I have memories of the big things, but what about the little things? What about the late night conversations in the dorm with my best girl friends? What about the heartbreak in high school when I realized a certain boy did not return my interest? What about the moments when God really spoke to me? What about the deep valleys when God felt so far away?

So, I have decided to restart my blog, but with a different angle ... I'm going to tell my story. Every day is a story. One story I have been thinking about today is my life before coming to Senegal. I taught high school French and I loved it. I love being in the classroom. I don't think I could be anything other than a teacher. I'm such a school supply nerd, too. I think that's a qualification for teachers - "Must love new crayons, pencils, pens, and erasers."

I spent three years in a great high school with great teachers and with great kids. I have many days where I really miss all that; days where I wonder if coming here was truly God's plan. Today was one. But today was different - I suddenly realized I missed all that because I missed how comfortable and safe I was before. I had a safe job in a comfortable community with a cute, comfortable apartment. Those three years I spent there, I was afraid to leave. I knew God wanted me to go on the mission field, but I was so comfortable. I did some seminary studies, I taught Sunday School, I chaperoned youth trips - I did anything that I thought would make up for the fact that I was not going ...

We all know how the story ended - I'm here. I'm not sure if returning to the mission field is something I can do long-term (definitely not single!) I know I will always be involved in missions somehow. It's in my blood. The main thing God has taught me through this experience is that I am not always going to be comfortable. I have to be willing, sometimes, to pull myself out of that comfortable little spot I have wrapped myself up in and take some risks. (People who know me really well know I am not a risk taker!) Coming to Africa was a huge risk for me and I am glad I did it.

I only have about seven months left here and I have been thinking about what I'm going to do when I return. I going back at the end of October and I'm wondering whether it would be worth it to apply to teach anywhere for the 2010-2011 school year. I'm not sure if anyone would hire me in the middle of the year. I'm also considering grad school - LSU has a really amazing French graduate studies program. The problem with that is they only accept new students in the fall, so I would have to wait till 2011. I know God has it all taken care of, I just have to remind myself of that everyday!

So I'm going to continue to write, hopefully everyday. We'll see.